Parents against Parrots


A switch flicks, darkness brings silence, a glass smashes, a seven year old enters the kitchen, to the argument.
Go back to your room, everything’s okay
Can I have a drink?
Just hold your horses, there’s broken glass
Can I have a drink?
Listen to your father, and go back to your room, please,
If I go back to my room, can I have a drink?
We’ll come see you soon. Jenn, I’m saying there’s no question that the system as it stands now in Ontario has been extremely effective in giving preference to young Catholic people and allowing opportunities to have a strong education.
You’re quoting him again.
I’m saying that our government has done everything in its power to strengthen the system that exists – and that means having a strong Catholic education system.
Really- her now? And what would you say, if, say, they cut funding to Catholics, and chose Hindus instead?
I really believe that the system as it exists should be strengthened, with an aim to cooperation, multiculturalism, and tolerance
I guess, well, what politician is going to engage the majority of their support base, and the christian lobby? Who wants to lose their job over that.
The debate had gone on three hours of wine too long. They went from discussing graffiti- stuck on the idea that modern art, hanging in galleries, was the climax of ‘good’ art- to the politics of tattoos- everyone will regret them, because we don’t have any- returning finally to the debate whether there were, well, dilemmas in only paying for Catholic schools from everyone’s taxes. The news was designed to share talking points, it seemed, and muzzle their critical, independent ideas.

Politics aside, Catholic schools teach our kids values, to go and do things, not just to sit around and talk about it, or repeat things they’d heard

WOW so everyone who isn’t Catholic just talks about the weather?
Values, I’m saying, of helping others, to be selfless, to be human- things you couldn’t learn on your own
You have no faith in people- is that ironic?
Jenn, I’m saying, how would you think to pack up your things, save your money, and go teach black people in their country how to be civilized? Education, that’s how-
Oh you’re just quoting the commercial now. I never understood all the clips of people in other countries: how was their suffering related to your white school board attempt to win over some parents-
Our kids went to save them, Jenn: Don’t act as though it wasn’t worth anything
mom mom I think everybody should just drink juice, can I have some

colour by ccekios

words by L.L. 

Parents Against Parents


Children were quite a test of who you were: They walked around repeating things you said, echoing things said in kitchens, like mobile parrots. You couldn’t blame a seven year old kid for having an opinion on Obamacare, or graffiti, or the government funding one branch of religious schools, because, well, they were seven. Born in ’07. You had to give a seven year old credit: They were seven. Seven. No seven year old actually thought I believe graffiti is immoral like tattoos, or I think to backing one religion while saying you’re mul-ti-culti-raw is so embarrassing! No. Or maybe they did. Maybe they were those seven year olds from Guinness, the Youngest University Student, Youngest and Most Bored Person In This Seminar, I Just Want Some Juice.

Parents were these labels used by adults for anything, really, like those scenes in Hollywood movies where the victim got away by saying I’m a parent- I have a daughter at home, and a dog who doesn’t listen to me unless I growl, or the capital P Parent, plastered on resumes, Member of the Parent Action Committee, Volunteer Organizer at Parents Against Obamacare, Director of Parents Against Parrots, Parents Against Alternative Medicine, Parents Against Medicine, Parents Against Parents, Parent Bar Meeting About Nothing.

I’ll have a pint of Guinness

Coors Light for me

I’ll follow the man with the gray hair and have a Guinness

Coming right up

I think you’re just jealous of my gray foxiness

That’s it

Miss Henderson seems to be quite the fan.

Whatever guys back to the issue: All I’m saying is that, sure, I appreciate that some people can be supported by the Government, but it’s been a hundred years: They’re not exactly some fading group

This coming from a man who drinks Coors Light.

Yeah, you forgot your skirt at home or what?

I’ll have you know that it is delicious and crispy. The point I was trying to make is that how can our government benefit with immigration and everything by saying oh, look at how tolerant we are, but we really prefer the Catholics.

You mean accepting.

You know what, I’ll agree with you, just for the sake of moving on.

You guys know what I’m saying

I think you’re forgetting the French thing: They kind of need it to keep their thing going, don’t you think?

The French: I think it’d save us a hell of a lot of tax payer dollars if we just let everyone do what they want

I guess that’s a good point, but why couldn’t they do it in a public system? How can you say we’re not going to think non-catholic means not-normal when there’s a fucking cross on the front lawn? Is that tolerance?

You mean acceptance. And I think that religion is part of culture, and so taking the Catholic away from French would be like, uh, taking you away from your water.


Let’s say this whole culture idea is good, that trying to create this one idea of what a normal person is in our province is like a necessary thing in order to sell the province to companies, it still assumes that the other traditions are foreign, because they’re not Catholic, or from here, although they are now from here

Someone get me a pistol and a bag of chips

Today, in class, we’ll be talking about languages: Does anyone remember about languages? Yes, Kathy?

English is a language.

Yes, it is. Does anybody know the names of some different languages?


Thank you, Brian, but please put up your hand next time.

They’re stupid


oh man


you‘re stupid!

Brian: That was not a nice thing to say, please apologize to the class.

I’m so sorry

Nobody is stupid: We’re all the same, it doesn’t matter what language you speak. Does anybody know the names of any other languages?

the French are so stupid cause they took my mom’s job

whatever bry your dad drinks coolers light!

to be continued this Friday

colour by ccekios

words by L. L. 

read more info on the current school debate in Ontario